What Do You Do on a Day of Solitude?

For years I have been urging the spiritual leaders around me to observe regular times of solitude, silence, and reflection. Ideally I try to take a day of solitude every 6-8 weeks (though this past year it’s been closer to every 3-4 months). Those familiar with the weight and burden of leadership usually agree with the principle, but ask the practical question: what do you actually do on a day of solitude? Here’s my answer.

  1. Look Inward. I spend a good portion of the day taking stock of my own heart. How am I feeling? What’s the state of my soul? What am I thinking about, wondering about, burdened about? Is there sin in my heart that needs to be confessed? Are there unseen ‘stressors’ that come to the surface when I slow down long enough to listen? I talk about these things with God in prayer. Then I usually write about them. I don’t journal regularly – but I do journal every time I take a day of solitude.
  2. Look Upward. I spend time worshipping God. This takes many forms: singing, praying, reading Scripture, listening to the Spirit’s prompting, enjoying Him. When the weather is nice, I often worship just by sitting outside and enjoying the created world. It’s amazing how loudly creation worships God – birds, wind, water – when you take time to listen.
  3. Look Backward. I look back over past journals and notes. How has God been at work in my life? What was I concerned about a year ago, two years ago, five years ago? What evidences of His grace do I see? What progress have I made? What progress haven’t I made? Have I acted appropriately on areas of past discernment?
  4. Look Forward. I spend some time thinking about my current and future priorities. What do I need to be doing? How do I sense God leading? How could I be better investing my God-given energies? Where do I need to push forward? Where do I need to wait on God?

Helpful Hints: Get up early and get out of the house and out of the city before everyone else does. An early start helps you make the most of the day. Also, because I have a family and I want to be fully present for them when I get home, I find it helpful to reserve the last 30-45 minutes of the day to hit a coffee shop, download my e-mail, and begin to act on whatever ideas, conversations, or plans have come into my mind during the day. In fact, that’s when I wrote this post.

Solitude is a spiritual discipline – which means that it’s a habit formed over time. The first few times you set aside a day for this purpose, you may experience nothing but static and distraction. Don’t give up.

And remember to rigorously ensure silence and contemplation. Cell phone off. Email closed. Wi-fi disabled. Setting free of distractions. Someplace away from the patterns of your everyday life, where silence is possible and solitude is valued. Those places are becoming fewer and fewer – but they exist. Seek and you shall find. My favorite spots: a friend’s lakehouse, a Benedictine monastery, and a Christian camp.


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  1. Very helpful. A couple of more thoughts for anyone considering doing this: 1) Just do it. I know you don’t have time, but if you’ll make the time you’ll discover that you don’t have time not to find silence and solitude if you’re going to lead spiritually. 2) Get away for a silent weekend once or twice a year. This affords you the luxury of an extended time to allow the noise of the world to die down. I always bring a bunch of stuff to read out of a fear I won’t have enough to do with all that time, but inevitably the time is filled with prayer and reflections and hearing God.

  2. I tried taking my first retreat day a few weeks ago, and it was hard work. Very surprising to me. The result is that I will be taking another shortly, appreciate your reasoning here.

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